W&L 9/2/04

WINNERS

PATTY HIGHTOWER The PTA super mom was a big, big winner. How big? Hightower, the former Florida PTA president and Florida Education Association 2004 President’s Award winner, downed two-term incumbent John DeWitt in the four-person race by nearly 3 votes to 1.

Hightower, who currently serves as the Escambia County coordinator of the Take Stock in Children program, is seen as an effective leader. She also drives one of the most recognizable buses in the county.

DeWitt was under investigation for ethics violations during the past year for appearing to help companies that employed him sell education software to the school district. He had a hearing with the Ethics Commission after the primary. Stay tuned.

JIM PAUL For the first time in nearly two decades, Escambia County has a two-term Superintendent of Schools. The voters saw through the micro-managing ways of the Escambia County School Board and realized Paul deserved credit for the huge improvement in the county’s public schools and teacher’s pay.

Despite a lack of support from Pensacola Area Chamber leaders and unfavorable coverage by the daily newspaper, Paul won re-election by a huge margin over Woodham High Principal Bill Slayton.

Paul looks like he may get even more accomplished in a second term with a school board that will work with him for the good of the students. Hightower creamed DeWitt, an administration nemisis, and 60 percent of District 5 voters said “No” to Linda Finkelstein in the primary, priming her for a loss in November’s election.

LOSERS

BUCK LEE He had a whole lotta moola–nearly $50,000 in his campaign war chest. But incumbent Mary Johnson, who raised close to $18,000, had a whole lotta votes. Johnson defeated the former Santa Rosa County and Escambia County commissioner in a landslide, earning nearly 65 percent of the vote. Reached on his cellphone shortly after the results were flashed up at the Santa Rosa Elections office, Lee says he has no idea why he lost but “I’m not excited about it.”

Before the election, many wondered why Lee wanted the Clerk of the Courts post. Lee proved, for the most part, one of the best commissioners out of Gulf Breeze in a long, long time. Independent News prognosticators pointed to Johnson’s spoil system and Lee’s chain smoking, as possible reasons for the lopsided outcome.

JERRY MELVIN The storied, foot-in-mouth, political career of Melvin came to a crashing end. The 18-year veteran of the state House lost, make that crushed, by more than 5,000 votes by a Niceville city worker, James Campbell. Melvin, who hung with the legendary He-Coon Bob Sikes in Capitol Hill, couldn’t hang in the Okaloosa County Commission race against Campbell, who heads the recreation department.

Melvin jumped in the race when shoe-in Jackie Burkett decided against a second term because of health problems. The loquacious Melvin, dubbed “The Mouth of the South,” has been hosting an Okaloosa talk radio morning show, “The Wakeup Call” on 1260 AM WFTW.

After his thumping in the primary the show’s name may change to “The Curtain Call” for Melvin. Wait, did you say State Senate race in 2006?

Outtakes 9/2/04

By Rick Outzen

ATTACK POVERTY We all knew Escambia County is one of the poorest areas in Florida. Census data recently confirmed it showing Escambia County is the poorest of the state’s 16 largest counties and the 17th poorest county in the nation. The Census Bureau reports that nearly 18 percent of Escambia’s households make less than  $15,000. Many poor live in Pensacola’s city limits.

While the Pensacola city staff plays political games, grants long-term contracts to out-of-state contractors, spends hundreds of thousands of dollars restudying the same issues, and sells off youth baseball parks to further expand a tiny airport, the city’s poorest citizens battle to break from generations of poverty.

While the Pensacola Area Chamber of Commerce runs down to the Escambia County commission meetings to support a $20 million-plus administration complex, pushes for Saenger Theatre renovations and pats itself on the back for bringing another call center to the area, and pretends to make itself vital to the small business man, many of our citizens struggle with poverty.

We can play the blame game and find fault with federal and state government programs. Or we can buckle down and really begin addressing poverty issue in this community. We can create training programs that lift people beyond dead-end, minimum-wage jobs. We can build a downtown library that promotes literacy and makes books available. We can invest in better community centers with computer labs.

Just maybe then a few could qualify for one of those high-paying Pensacola legal department or Pensacola Chamber administrative jobs.

The Escambia County School District is trying to make an impact on area poverty. Our school are often the first line of attack in fighting poverty. In September, the school district is hosting a daylong workshop, “Bridges Out of Poverty: Strategies for Professionals and Communities,” that is designed for social service agencies who work with the poor. Maybe City of Pensacola and Pensacola Chamber members could attend.

Escambia County doesn’t have to accept this perennial, low economic ranking.

STUDERS REPEAT SUCCESS Quint and Rishy Studer’s Pensacola Pelicans once again gave Pensacola a winner. Thank you!

This was the team’s first year in the reputed Central League of Professional Baseball. Many felt the young franchise would take some licks. Little did they understand the drive of the Studers and manager Bernie Carbo.

The Pelicans finished 55-40, which was second best in the league behind Edinburg and won the East Division’s second half, clinching a spot in the post season playoffs.

The season got off to a rocky start with the Pelicans losing eight of its first 12 games. The Pelicans then won 19 of their next 23 games, surging into first place. From then on, the Pensacola baseball team remained atop the CBL East Division.

Pelicans’ management proved having an eye for talented ball players. Four Pelicans signed with Major League teams, which is the most from one team in the Central League this season. Five times this year, a Pelican was chosen as either Batter or Pitcher of the Week. Three Pelicans were named to the Central League’s All-Star Team.

Pelican Rafael Alvarez earned the 2004 CBL Player of the Year award. Alvarez finished with a league-leading .353 batting average and a .642 slugging percentage. He smacked 12 homeruns and 21doubles and collected 52 RBI and 60 runs.

The Pelicans season ended Saturday, Aug. 28 when the Shreveport Sports beat them 13-9 in Game 5 of the CBL East Division Championship Series. It was a great season. I look forward to next spring!

MAKE AN IMPRESSION We all can agree role models are needed for today’s youth. Junior Achievement is looking for a few good men and women who are willing to make an impact.

For many of us, there has been one person who shared their knowledge and experience and gave us the courage to be the more than even we realize we could be. For me, it was my high school Latin teacher Mr. Herman Solomon. Mr. Solomon was a retired educator who had a junior high school named after him. His love for education and language was so great that Mr. Solomon came out of retirement to teach a small band of Catholic teens in Mississippi the classics. I still remember him quoting Caesar and Cicero with fire and emotion.

Junior Achievement needs volunteer consultants like that to go into the classroom for only one hour a week to share their valuable experience with kids, teaching them about business and about hope for the future.

This could be your chance to be a Mr. Solomon and make a difference on today’s youth, inspiring them to get involved and strive for success.

If you have enjoyed a successful business career and are interested in giving something back, become a JA Volunteer Consultant today. Call Northwest Florida’s Junior Achievement office at 477-1420 or e-mail the group at nwflja@bellsouth.net.

The Buzz 9/2/04

ELECTION 2006 It’s never too early to start the buzz about the next election, is it? And it looks like the fight for state Sen. Charlie Clary’s seat is going to be hot, hot, hot.

Term limits will oust Clary from the Florida Senate in 2006 and already, multi-millionaire Okaloosa County School Superintendent Don Gaetz and state Rep. and Golden Child Holly Benson are apparently eyeing the District 4 seat that stretches along the coast from Escambia County to Bay County.

The match-up would be a campaign of heavy weight proportions.

Gaetz, a health care company owner worth an estimated $24 million, considered a run for Congress in 2001 to replace retiring U.S. Rep. Joe Scarborough. Unopposed this year in his re-election bid for superintendent, Gaetz isn’t ruling out a state Senate bid.

Gaetz, who also served two terms on the Okaloosa School Board, told the Daily News back in March: “Running after six years as superintendent is different than running for Congress when we hadn’t done anything other than raise expectations. I’ve had strong encouragement from Northwest Florida people and people involved in state politics to keep my options open for 2006.”

Meanwhile, Benson, who was elected to the House in 2000, has steadily climbed the House ladder, earning two committee chairmanships and appointments to key committees. The daughter of Lois Benson, a former state rep, Benson has raised close to $85,000 against two nobodies who qualified as write-in candidates and who have raised zilch.

It’s rumored Benson, backed by big moneymen, will use her substantial war chest to increase her name recognition, even further, in Northwest Florida with political ads leading up to November.

No matter what, this promises to be a good one. Maybe even former Dean of the House Jerry Melvin will run. He’ll only be a well-preserved 94.

MEL’S SURPRISE A newspaper with standards? C’mon. Can’t be.

More likely the St. Petersburg Times realized it was supporting a President Bush-backed candidate when it yanked its U.S. Senate endorsement for U.S. Housing Secretary Mel Martinez a day before the Aug. 31 primary.

But opinion editors claimed they threw their Birkenstock, tree-hugging, liberal-loving weight behind former U.S. Rep. Bill McCollum because Martinez “took his campaign into the gutter with hateful and dishonest attacks on his strongest opponent.”

The Times further opines: “Martinez may accomplish in public life, his reputation will be forever tainted by his campaign’s nasty and ludicrous slurs of McCollum in the final days of this race.”

Yeah, yeah. Waah, waah.

Guess, Betty Castor can go ahead now and count on St. Pete’s endorsement. Why even bother to show up to the editorial board meeting?

FLORIDA’S CONVENTION The buzz at a breakfast for Florida Republican convention delegates after the first day of the Republican National Convention in NYC wasn’t about the previous night’s speeches by Rudy Giuliani and John McCain or the anticipated speeches by Arnold Schwarzenegger and George P. Bush.

Instead, much of the chatter was about destructive events back home: the aftermath of Hurricane Charley, the culmination of a nasty GOP Senate primary and the looming threat of Hurricane Frances.

Chief Financial Officer Tom Gallagher, considered a likely candidate for governor in 2006, spoke to the delegation about Charley relief efforts and the progress of Frances.

The Florida delegation, which was assigned highly visible stage-right seats in front of the podium, is without its most visible political figure, Gov. Jeb Bush, who opted to stay home to oversee Charley relief efforts.

In Bush’s absence, Florida’s most conspicuous figures at the convention have been Gallagher and Lt. Gov. Toni Jennings, considered another likely candidate for governor in 2006. A third likely candidate for governor, Attorney General Charley Crist, has been in Florida campaigning for Senate hopeful Mel Martinez. But Crist plans to make his presence known by hosting a luncheon for the delegation on Thursday.

Crist’s lunch is slated for the same time as a lunch at the Harvard Club hosted by state Rep. Carl Domino, R-Jupiter, who wants to be House Speaker in 2009-2010.

Domino, who has been staying at the Harvard Club a few blocks from the Hilton New York where the Florida delegation is lodged, said Tuesday that his efforts to schmooze his fellow Floridians have been hampered by the tight security around convention hotels. The hotels have been restricting access only to people who show their room keys.

Letters & Opinions 9/2/04

OHMYGOD! I, like Mike Papantonio, was “shocked” to learn that Bob Perry (the man behind the Swift Boat Veterans ad) was actually a Bush supporter (Independent News, “GOP Behind Swift Boat Smear,” Aug. 27). And to find out that he actually has connections to the Republican Party? An outrage!

It makes we wonder if other people who have contributed to a particular party are actually supporters of that party. Take, for instance, oh…I don’t know, maybe George Soros?

I would like to see Pap turn his investigative reporting towards Soros and see what links George might have with the Democratic Party. If he was “shocked” at Perry spending $100,000, he might be rendered “speechless” at the amount Soros has spent.

—Michael Duncan, Pensacola

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POOR, POOR PENSACOLA Escambia being listed as the poorest county in the state should be a clarion call for wholesale house cleaning of those well-recognized names we continue to elect to serve us.

Once elected, they become over-paid, part-time workers, whose greatest pain is inability to cope with the pain of a new idea. Once elected, these idea-sterile, career politicians pass the baton of power to the un-elected entrenched cartel whose objectives and decisions revolve on job security and maintaining the status quo.

Maintaining a low profile is their greatest of all skills. These so-called servants of ours are immune from the facts of life. The ordinary rules of living don’t apply to civil servants. They do not suffer from inflation, they do not suffer from unemployment, they automatically get honors and their salaries, benefits and retirement programs are generous and secure.

The poverty level in the county is not surprising. It is the direct product of the mistaken policy conceived a years ago that tourism promotion would be the diesel engine driving our economic future. It should be evident that an abundance of poverty-level wage jobs has been the main product of tourism promotion.

There is a solution. Tourism promotion must be relegated to back burner status. It must be replaced with industrial-type jobs, even though, they may have some insignificant impact on the environment.

But, if we keep electing the same status quo, high-profile people to responsible positions, the poverty numbers in Escambia County will continue to escalate at an accelerating rate.

—Mark Avelli, Pensacola

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GAMBLING PAYS On Nov. 2, Florida voters will have an opportunity to take the first step toward providing billions of dollars for public schools by passing the ballot initiative, Amendment 4. The measure would allow Miami-Dade and Broward counties to hold separate elections, so the voters in those two counties can decide whether to permit slot machines in existing parimutuel facilities.

According to the amendment, any revenues generated from the taxed, licensed and regulated slot machines would go to supplement—not replace—current school funding everywhere in Florida.

The YES for Local Control Campaign, which is sponsoring Amendment 4, has presented a detailed study that estimates the measure would provide at least $438 million for public education in the first year alone and about $2.34 billion over five years.

While most Florida voters clearly see local control and more money for education as good reasons to pass Amendment 4, some opponents don’t support slot machines.

But what many people don’t realize is that millions of dollars are currently being wagered at Indian Casinos, gambling cruises and on the Internet. But not one single dime of that money goes to help our children.

According to a report by the U.S. House Transportation Committee, Florida operates the most cruises-to-nowhere in the nation with over 5,000 slot machines. In 2002, the Florida Day Cruise Association said there were 18 gambling vessels operating out of Florida ports. The trade association estimates the cruises have 3 million passengers a year, about 40 percent of which are tourists.

The Seminole Tribe just opened its new $279 million Hard Rock Hotel & Casino in the South Florida city of Hollywood. The facility houses more than 2,000 electronic gaming machines and 40 live-action poker tables.

And the Hard Rock Casino is just one of the Seminole and Miccosukee Indian tribes’ six gaming locations in Florida. The tribes conduct high-stakes bingo, card gaming and video gaming. The facilities attract thousands of players who spend hundreds of millions of dollars into slot machines every year.

The YES for Local Control Campaign says Florida taxpayers would benefit from an industry that would gladly tax itself to help education.

—Stacey Brenan, YES for Local Control Campaign member

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FAIR AND IMPARTIAL? Someone recently said Pat Kinsey is “deeply committed to justice.” However, if you ask what citizens think who have appeared before her or who have seen her in action—including rock-solid, devout, conservative, upstanding community members—they say she is a petty tyrant who intimidates citizens, and that she pushes a private, warped, and brutal brand of justice through a biased agenda.

The Florida Supreme Court thinks so little of Kinsey’s “commitment to justice” that they fined her $50,000 and publicly bawled her out for giving the public the “false and misleading impression” that “a judge’s role…(is to) combat crime and support police officers as opposed to (presiding over) an impartial tribunal where justice is dispensed without favor or bias.”

The Supreme Court said her promises to favor the police over citizens violated “the basic principles of the rule of law and the strict impartiality required of courts,” principles which even “first year law students know.”

Everyone who respects the judicial process and expects dignified treatment in a courtroom should be afraid when the judge wants to prosecute, convict and punish them, instead of just being fair.

Kinsey is not fair and does not know what justice is.

—Mike Rollo, Pensacola

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START YOUR BUSES I feel that getting a community transportation system in Santa Rosa County is good! It will save on gas and create less traffic. If you have a limitation, it would be nice not having to drive yourself, or just to be able to get out. You can make your appointments around the transit schedule. You can be independent.

A positive opinion, would be that Santa Rosa could be merging with ECAT in Escambia County. When I asked them, how much? They answered: $1 for transportation within Santa Rosa and $3 within Escambia.

I don’t know about you, but I listen to and hear friends, people and strangers, who are around me.

They’re people here in Gulf Breeze, who would love to be independent and be able to get to work or be able to go to the grocery store when they need something.

God taught us through his Word that we are to help one another, to listen and to do his will. Look at Psalm 72:12-13. God loves and cares for his people, even the less fortunate.

How can we not do his will and to help others, as He does?

Say, “Yes,” to public transportation in Santa Rosa County. Let our cares for others be seen and heard.

—Diane Akers, Gulf Breeze

How-To Guide

By Duwayne Escobedo

You never know when you’ll get elected to office and need to know how to get rich quick. You never know when you might be flying, the pilot passes out drunk and you have to land the plane. You never know when you might have to ditch a blind date.

Enter the Independent News whizzes. On this Labor Day, the IN steps in and lets you know how to do some real tough and dirty jobs. Hey, someone’s got to do it.

So, dear reader, peruse this indespensable how-to guide very carefully. There’s not a must-know subject we didn’t cover, except for how to build a media empire. We’re still working on that one.

Read the following dozen how-tos and keep this guide handy, after all you never know when you too will drive off the Pensacola Bay Bridge ñ or have a craving for sex on the beach.

HOW TO GET RICH IN POLITICAL OFFICE No. 1

1. Have your wife set up a real estate trust.

2. Influential supporters let you know about prime parcels and condominium projects. They even arrange short-term financing that requires no down payment.

3. Get your wife’s “real estate trust” to buy the land or get pre-construction discounts for a condominium unit. The trust uses the no-down-payment financing, so no money changes hands.

4. Supporters complete the sale to a large developer or other Daddy Warbucks for the land or condominium unit that’s $20,000 to $100,000 more than the original purchase price. The wife’s trust makes a tidy profit without ever risking any money. And the politician doesn’t have to report the income because it’s in a trust controlled by his wife.

5. Make sure the wife is happy.

HOW TO GET RICH IN POLITICAL OFFICE no. 2

1. Become a consultant to companies that your government body buys from or regulates.

2. For instance, a school board member might consult with a company selling educational software. A state legislator might consult with a road paver.

3. Beware. This one can lead to an ethics complaint or IRS investigation. (Recommend using method No. 1.)

HOW TO GET AROUND SINGLE-MEMBER DISTRICTS

In Escambia County:

1. It’s recommended that candidates live in their districts at least the first time around.

2. Once elected, the official can sell that home and find a low-rent apartment that he can call “home.” Then the official can actually live anywhere in the state that he wants. This is known as the “Rev. Ronnie Ruse.”

3. Or the elected official can opt to keep the house in his district but actually live with his new wife in a waterfront condo. Be sure to only claim a homestead exemption on the house in your district. This is known as the “J.D. Shuffle.”

In Santa Rosa County:

1. Switch the ownership of your home outside the district with the ownership of a house a relative owns in the district, such as a trailer in Harold.

2. Sleep at either, but if you get worried the voters might be upset, park your car at the in-district home at least twice a week. This is known as the “Dawsey Dodge.”

In Okaloosa County:

Oops. Sorry, Supervisor of Elections Pat Hollarn doesn’t play that game. Go to Circuit Court and see “Doug Hutchinson” file.

HOW TO LAND A SMALL PLANE

1. First, realize if you’re depending on this newspaper to actually help you in this emergency, then kiss your ass goodbye! Here, we will assume you just lost your pilot but can see the landing strip.

2. Take your place at the controls. It ain’t going to fly itself.

3. Put on the radio headphones. Press a control button on the plane’s steering wheel (yoke) or a CB-like microphone on the instrument panel. Press the button to talk, release it to listen. Scream calmly: “Mayday! Mayday!” and give your situation and plane call numbers, which should be printed on the top of the instrument panel. Avoid bawling like a baby.

4. If you get no response, try again on the emergency channel ñ tune the radio to 121.5. All radios are different, but tuning is standard. The person on the other end should be trained to talk you through the proper landing procedures. If not, kiss your ass goodbye!

5. Follow the air traffic controller’s instructions very carefully ñ put this paper away. If you cannot reach someone to talk you through the landing process, then you will have to do it alone. Good luck!

6. Get your bearings ñ take the paper back out. Head toward an open landing strip with all the red fire trucks.

7. Begin the descent. Pull back on the throttle (black lever between the seats) to slow down. Reduce power to about one-quarter of cruising speed. As the plane slows, the nose will drop. For descent, the nose should be about four inches below the horizon.

8. Deploy the landing gear. Fixed gear is always down so you need to do nothing. If gear is retractable, there will be another lever between the seats near the throttle, with a handle that is shaped like a tire. Make sure you don’t push the wrong lever.

9. Line up the landing strip so that when the altimeter reads 1,000-feet the field is off the right-wing tip. The altimeter is a red dial in the middle of the instrument panel that indicates altitude: the small hand indicates feet above sea level in thousand-foot increments, the large hand is in hundreds.

10. When approaching the landing strip, reduce power by pulling back on the throttle. Don’t let the nose drop more than six inches below the horizon.

11. The plane should be 100-feet off the ground when you are just above the landing strip, and the rear wheels should touch first. The plane will stall at 55 to 65 mph, and you want the plane to hit stall speed when the wheels touch the ground.

12. Pull all the way back on the throttle, and make sure the nose of the plane does not dip too steeply. Gently pull back on the yoke as the plane slowly touches the ground.

13. Using the pedals on the floor, steer and brake the plane as needed. The upper pedals are the brakes, and the lower pedals control the direction of the nose wheel. Concentrate first on the lower pedals. Press the right pedal to move the plane right, press the left pedal to move it left. Got it?

14. When the plane comes to a stop (assuming you’ve followed these directions closely and haven’t sent it cartwheeling down the runway), haul your ass out ASAP. Try to take the pilot and any other passengers with you.

HOW TO DITCH A BAD BLIND DATE

1. Never, we repeat, never tell the date what you’re really going to wear, but be sure the date describes in detail what he or she is going to wear.

2. For example, tell her you’re wearing a red Polo shirt. Instead, wear a white Oxford button-down.

3. Agree to meet at a public place with lots of people, preferably a crowded bar or restaurant.

4. Arrive 15 minutes ahead of agreed upon meeting time. Sit in a corner, but have a good view of the front door and access to a quick exit.

5. If she’s less than expected, make a dash for nearest door.

6. If she’s your dream gal, then tell her you spilled a drink on your red shirt and it’s in the laundry and order drinks. (Note: This plan works equally well for men and women.)

HOW TO HAVE SEX ON THE BEACH

Ingredients needed:
1.5 ounces of vodka
1.5 ounces of peach schnapps
2 ounces pineapple juice
2 ounces orange juice
Top off with cranberry juice

Mixing directions: Pour all the ingredients into a shaker. Fill a highball glass almost full of ice cubes, and dump ice into shaker. Shake well and pour drink into highball glass.

HOW TO PROPERLY DRAPE A FEMALE CLIENT DURING A MASSAGE

1. To keep female clients’ breasts from becoming exposed while draping them for an abdominal massage, start with the client face up with the top sheet fully covering her from the neck down.

2. Put a pillowcase over her neck, rumpled up.

3. Pinching the pillowcase and sheet together, pull both down, with the pillowcase unraveling and trailing the sheet down the client’s body.

4. Once the pillowcase has covered the breasts, leave it behind. Continue with only the sheet until her abdomen is exposed.

5. Tuck in pillowcase and sheet. We have no idea what happens when the client is ready to roll over for the client’s butt massage.

HOW TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB WHEN GLASS IS BROKEN

1. Turn off light. Unplug, if possible.

2. Press a peeled potato into the metal base.

3. Unscrew the remains of the bulb from the fixture.

4. Discard potato. Don’t try to reuse it in the potato salad.

HOW TO DETERMINE WHEN YOUR SPOUSE IS REALLY ASLEEP

1. Pick up his or her hand.

2. Hold it above his or her face.

3. Drop it.

4. If they smack themselves, they’re most likely unconscious. If that doesn’t wake them, try putting a 9-volt battery on their tongue.

HOW TO CREATE A PUBLIC REVOLT

1. Have a citizen’s committee study an issue like an auditorium a waterfront park on the city’s Trillium site, but stack the committee with the predetermined outcome in mind.

2. Bring in “expert” consultants to produce a study that supports the predetermined outcome.

3. Understate the costs and ask for the Pensacola city council’s conceptual approval.

4. Have a private meeting with the Pensacola News Journal’s editorial board. Have the cityÕs PR firm sell them on the project.

5. Get a favorable front-page story placed in the daily.

6. Then, modify the plan before putting out requests to build the boondogle.

7. When public opposition is voiced at council meetings, let them speak, but tell them it’s not time to vote on the issue.

8. Have the city council approve the engineers, architects and contractors. Let opposition speak, but don’t react.

9. Have the council approve the financing plan. Let opposition speak, but don’t react.

10. Finally have the council approve the project. Let opposition speak, but tell them itÕs too late now.

(Note: This plan is tried and true on the city’s Trillium project, Port of Pensacola leases and selling off of youth baseball fields near the city’s airport.)

HOW TO SURVIVE DRIVING OFF PENSACOLA BAY BRIDGE

1. As soon as you are airborne and before you land in the water, think about opening your window. An open window allows water to come in and equalize the pressure. When the water pressure inside and outside the car is equal, you can push open the door and avoid a watery grave.

2. If your power windows freak out or you’re too fat to crawl through the window, attempt to kick out the damn glass with your foot.

3. Do not wait for the car to sink. Get out! Depending on your trajectory and the vehicle you drive, floating time ranges from a few seconds to a few minutes. Cars with front engines sink at a steep angle, so the vehicle may end up upside down.

4. If you cannot open the window or break it, you have one final option. Remain calm. Do not panic. Wait until the car begins filling with water. When the water reaches your chin the pressure inside and outside the car should be equal, take a deep breath and hold it. You should be able to open the door, swim to the surface and have a real cool story to tell your grandchildren.

HOW TO SURVIVE A RIP CURRENT

A rip current is a strong but narrow surface current of water flowing out past the surf zone that can pull even Olympian Michael Phelps into deeper water beyond the sand bar.

1. Do not hyperventilate. The rip current will not pull you under.

2. Call or wave for assistance. If you’re almost anywhere on Santa Rosa Island, except Casino Beach, skip this step because public officials say lifeguards are a luxury and you’re stupid for getting in the water in the first place.

3. Swim parallel to shore until you are out of the rip current. Don’t fight the current.

4. Once you escape the current, swim towards shore.

5. If you are unable to swim out of the rip current, float or calmly tread water. When out of the current, swim towards shore. Remember: it’s important to conserve energy.

6. If you cannot swim freestyle (an overhand stroke) for 15 minutes, you should not be in the ocean above your knees or without an inner tube. Go take swimming lessons!

In da’ pink

By James Hagen

ROM MURDER TO MUSIC

Feb. 3, 1993: Art Mullen is gunned down by his daughter, Michaelanne, in their Victorian-era home. The brutal crime shocks and scandalizes the tight-knit Pensacola community. Mullen, who had recently moved back in with her parents with her two sons the previous year, is charged with second-degree murder. It’s later reduced to manslaughter and she serves a short prison term.

A lot of urban myths surface as to the motive of the crime. The consensus seems to be that it was a bad relationship that reached a bad end.

Aug. 28, 2004: Over 40 people, various ages, sit quietly in the same Victorian abode, now known as Mac’s Coffeehouse. Some are writing, many are nodding their head as they listen to Mi Capitan belt out songs of love, loss and redemption.

The music enclave, dubbed the “Pink House” for its color scheme both inside and out, has had a sexy and tragic history.

Now, in perhaps its final incarnation, it has become the best place to hear acoustic music in Pensacola.

“The previous owner was a flamboyant interior decorator,” says Volunteer Ellen Earles, referring to Art Mullen. “Initially, I thought it was a bit much for what we wanted, but the house has its own charm. It grows on you. We don’t want to do anything to lose that.”

The two-story, three-bedroom, two-bathroom, turn-of-the-century home is indeed over the top. Chandeliers prominently hang from many of the rooms. The house is filled with mirrors on the ceiling, the closets and walls. Baroque art decks the walls.

Adventurous sorts can even open a window and step out on the outer balcony, though that’s not technically allowed. Christmas lights are strung along the balcony. A fountain can be seen in the backyard.

As a stark reminder of its sordid past, however, a faded bloodstain can be seen on the wall next to the staircase.

The Pink House was purchased by McIlwain Presbyterian Church, which lies adjacent to the house, earlier this year and began hosting music this spring. The original idea, Earles contends, was for the place to become a safe hangout for people of all ages to come and hear music.

“It’s like the Willy Wonka house,” bubbles Mac’s regular Christina Kennedy. “This is like how Van Gogh’s (now known as End of the Line Café) used to be. It’s not intimidating; you can be at peace here.”

Another Mac’s groupie, Holly Robertson, agrees. “It’s not so corporate. It has this different, unconventional atmosphere.”

The coffeehouse has hosted the best of Pensacola’s acoustic talent, including

Davey Blackmon, Mike Roycroft, Kent Stanton, Chad Bishop and Elisabeth LoPicollo. Performances typically last more than an hour. The musicians tend to rave about the place.

“I like the murder house,” Blackmon boasts. “The acoustics are great.

The wallpaper is fluffy. The bathroom smells like blueberries.”

Those weary that religion is going to be force-fed to them, need not fear. Tracts aren’t handed out at the door; no one asks if you’re saved; and no religious imagery dons the coffeehouse.

“I’ve never been a big fan of church-related venues,” Roycroft explains. “What has taken me aback is how genuinely nice people there are without trying to preach to you or convert you at all. It made me suspicious at first, until I finally figured out that it was for real; no axe was going to suddenly fall. They are just nice, warm, positive people.”

Superstitious patrons also have nothing to fear, says one volunteer. “Our mojo is better than their mojo,” insists patron George Earles. “The pastor prayed in here when the church bought the place.”

Seems too that the ghost of the “Pink House” past must dig old-school, acoustic tunes.

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What: Travis Brown and Dale Halstead
When: 8-11 p.m. Friday, Sept. 3
Where: Mac’s Coffeehouse, 1200 E. Blount St.
Cost: Free
Details: 748-8289 or www.mcilwain.org/mac’s/

Local Licks Licked?

By Sam Baltrusis

ROCK 106 GOES SOUL

Divas like Aretha Franklin and Gladys Knight flipped off rockers Motley Crue and KISS as well as local hardcore heavies Orphan Wells and Face For Radio in an odd format change at Pensacola’s Cumulus-owned radio station.

Local musicians are mourning Pensacola’s Pure Rock station, Rock 106, biting the dust last week. According to station managers, WRRX changed its format, from rock to classic soul officially Monday, Aug. 30. The new Magic 106.1 spins Motown sing-a-longs from Marvin Gaye, Al Greene and Patti LaBelle.

Like the Queen of Soul, diehard 106 devotees demand a little respect for the fallen channel.

“My car is in the shop and I turned on 106 in my rental car and I was like ‘this is wrong,'” says Darren Johansen, Face For Radio’s manager. “For the local kids, it’s really going to mess things up. Rock 106 was giving them a lot of publicity and it was helping them build a following. A small-bar show that would normally draw 30 or 40 people could easily pull in 150 to 250 people when they got the word out. It’s a sad day for local music.”

Followers of the local metal and hardcore scene view the change as a huge black eye to the face of the regional rock community. With Rock 106 staples, like “Local Licks,” yanked from the air, local musicians have one less outlet to reach the masses.

“It’s really tough because that was our only radio outlet to be heard,” says Imperial Shreds’ frontman, A.J. Fratto. “They backed us 110 percent. Now, that Rock 106 is gone, local acts are in purgatory. Unlike other local stations, Rock 106 supported us no matter what.”

Face For Radio’s manager agrees with Fratto.

“‘Local Licks’ was such an important thing because a lot of people got to hear the bands if, for whatever reason, they couldn’t see them live,” Johansen adds. “It was definitely regional exposure for these guys. These are our hometown boys and Rock 106 was the only local station supporting them.”

“Local Lick’s” former host, Matt “The Stoneman” Stone was floored when he heard it through the grapevine that Rock 106 no longer would be rocking.

“I feel terrible,” Stone says, obviously distraught by the switch. “We really tried hard to support the local guys and I feel like we’ve let them down.”

While Stone is filling in at the Cumulus-owned sister station, Q100, he is uncertain of the fate of “Local Licks.”

“Right now, things are up in the air,” he quips.

When asked if he was going to fight for “Local Licks,” Stone says empathically: “Yes, absolutely.”

Meanwhile, Rock 106’s former program director, Dan McClintock transferred to a Cumulus station in Ohio.

“If this happened six months ago, we wouldn’t be where we are now,” says Terrific Kid’s Frankie Andrews. “It’s really going to hurt the local scene and it’s really going to hurt local bands. Matt was so supportive of us. We could knock on the backdoor of Rock 106, hand Matt our CD and he would put it on air.”

Terrific Kid’s guitarist adds: “It’s going to be really hard now to find that kind of support.”

Rave New World

By Darrell Carter

EDM SCENE GETS FACELIFT

Since the late ’90s, “rave” culture has been bitch slapped by the mainstream. In Pensacola, media coverage of electronic dance music, or”scarce at best” has mirrored reporting across the country. Stories about “all-night drug parties with psychedelic light shows and bass-heavy rhythms” have hurt the cause of EDM lovers here and everywhere. And, it gets worse.

The EDM scene has taken a huge hit, thanks in part to anti-rave legislation, such as U.S. Sen. Joseph Biden’s 2002 Amber Alert Bill with its anti-rave clause snuck into the verbiage. Even today, the effects of mind-boggling laws can be seen in the Panhandle’s small-yet-persevering dance culture.

At one time, Pensacola seemed destined for EDM greatness, hosting numerous events that drew partiers from across the Gulf Coast. Then progress took a kick in the rear. Bedlam (now 15 East) ”a late-night bottle club featuring EDM” for years was the base for Pensacola’s underground electronic family. But the club lost the interest of old-school regulars when longtime DJ Jonathan Wells and club manager Marc Cook abruptly resigned in 1999 amid conflict with ownership.

“The downfall of Bedlam was its own fault,” says Steve Granger, a local promoter/DJ who has fought his own battles in the area. “They’re always thinking about dollar bills. That place was the heart. Everyone went there, but eventually I lost interest in Bedlam.”

Promotion crew Insomnia Project, headed by DJ Q, kept Bedlam’s attendance numbers steady for a few years, organizing events and lowering the age limit to 16. Several new DJs got an opportunity to play, but by most accounts the family feel, dysfunctional as it often was, had disappeared.

Optimism returned when Wells, Cook and others opened Form ”an upscale dance club” in 2000, but it closed after about a year. Cook soon opened The Basement, located beneath the Seville Inn, entertaining EDM lovers (and indie rock fans) for a couple of years. But The Basement also closed in 2003.

Today, Pensacola is without a steady EDM venue. 15 East, plush and well lit, is the antithesis of Bedlam’s dark decor. East caters to primarily a hip-hop clientele. But those who formed the old EDM crew, along with newbie promoters, have rejuvenated some enthusiasm. Somehow, the fellas believe they can put Pensacola back on the electronica map.

“We want to present a more positive image of electronic music,” says Nathaniel Hinds, a promoter who recently began throwing monthly Saturday night parties called “Resurrections” at J.J.’s Pizza on North Davis Highway. “J.J.’s is a stepping stone.  People are tired of spinning in their rooms. We’re all working to help each other. There’s no market for competition.”

Hinds believes the recent EDM incarnation is driven by the music, not the Ecstasy. “In the beginning, the scene was perceived as a hippie revival with turntables, but unfortunately it was about the drugs,” he says. “People wanted to be part of a movement, but it takes a while to catch on.”

Michael Monroe, a veteran house DJ who’s in the Air Force and often visits the Panhandle area, insists the people in the EDM scene have grown up and moved away from the rave culture.

He sees Pensacola as having a strong scene and talent comparable to his hometown of San Diego.

“Pensacola DJs have always presented quality shit,” Monroe says during a recent visit to 15 East.

He notes that the building’s feeling is “not even close” to the old days.  Despite Monroe’s pessimism about 15 East, he’s optimistic about the direction of the EDM scene nationally.

“(The scene) is going to clubs, and that’s the only way we’re going to keep it alive. The underground is gone. But (the music) is coming back because we’re smarter, more intelligent, now.”

Granger also understands the move away from rave culture. Along with former partner Brian Holley, he endured an October 1999, “straight-up S.W.A.T. team-style” raid of one of their parties held at a local American Legion Hall (netting only four minor arrests).

“I hired off-duty policemen, and I tried to make it as legit as I could,” Granger recalls. “That’s when I realized there was a problem in the (electronic music) scene.”

Chris Scallion, who spins as Da Choppa, concedes: “We want to show that (electronic music) is not about drugs and drinking. It’s about good music and good times. (The decline of the EDM scene) brought me down a little, but I’m a dedicated person. It’s eventually going to come back. You’ve got to have love for the music. You’ve got to have a never-quit attitude.”

Also trying to push forward are Justin Griffith (Solarus), Brian Moulter (Syndrome) and Melanie Saighman (MeloStar), who present EDM in The Courtyard at 15 East every Friday and Saturday night. Griffith says the music is “anything electronic with a pumping sound.”

Despite negativity from some people, who have sworn off 15 East, Griffith says the trio “don’t care” and that “the people who support us far outweigh the negative people.”

Moore says Pensacola’s fickle EDM heads contribute to the decline of the scene.

“It may have to do with the extensive drug use and people’s personal issues.  Instead of going out, they didn’t because of beefs and problems with others. Those people are still here, but they just want quality events. They don’t want to go somewhere and feel like they have to be or act a certain way. They support those who love the music.”

Granger, who has attended parties since the early ’90s in Seattle, is familiar with the ups and downs of his music culture.

“(The EDM scene) has left the dark, dirty warehouse and it has gone into the club,” he insists. “If you look back at history, it always repeats. Like rock ‘n’ roll and Woodstock, it’s going to come back. Too many people enjoy this music.”